Saying Goodbye

Yesterday was rough. By the time we got home, I was completely drained. I came down with a cold this weekend, so that added to the fact that I was mentally dealing with the loss of Mike's mom....well, it took every ounce of energy right out of my body.

I'm glad that day is over. Walking into the funeral home, I had this sudden, overwhelming urge to turn and run. It was like a mini panic attack, and I felt like I was going to hurl at the same time. It's like it hit me -- we lost a PARENT.

Not a great-grandparent, or a grandparent, or a great aunt or uncle .... it was a P A R E N T. It made me think about my folks, and just how torn up I'll be when I lose them. God, I pray that doesn't happen for a long, long time.

But it's tough. His mom was 48. My mother is just weeks from turning 58. Everyone says, "Oh, they're not old!" ..... Well, no, they aren't, really. But when you just attended the funeral services for your husband's mother that didn't reach her fiftieth birthday yet, it's a bit harder to digest. Since my folks hit 55, I've cringed at every birthday that they've gotten closer to 60.

It's depressing to think about, and moreso depressing to sit here and blog about it. Someone, slap me!!!