Friday, March 23, 2007


Life can sometimes be so overwhelming that it's difficult to get up and start each day.

2007 didn't start off well, and here we are in the 3rd month and it hasn't gotten much better.

Emotionally I've hit a low, and it's doing damage. I'm feeling resentful towards my children, I'm unhappy with my marriage and I'm not finding the enjoyment in the things I used to.

Sadly, I think it may be time to be put back on antidepressants.

While I'm currently not feeling quite as 'low' as I was, I know that doesn't mean I'm better.

Hopefully as the weather improves, my mood will as well. And I hope that there's an answer or a way for Mike and I to work through this tough time. We're planning to go on a 'date' tomorrow night, perhaps it'll remind us of why we fell in love and got married in the first place.

In the meantime.....just know that I'm working through a tough patch, and I hope that soon I'll be feeling 'normal' again.

Monday, March 12, 2007

Told you so

Today Mike decided that going back to work for Sbarro was not going to work out. He was supposed to train the first week (last week) at one store (he did) and this week he'd be starting at the store he'd be working at on a permanent basis. He spoke with them regarding doing a schedule that would allow him 1 day off over the weekend. They were going to be discussing it. As of yesterday, he still hadn't heard anything about what this week's schedule was going to be. They were supposed to return his call yesterday, and he didn't hear a word. All he knew is that he was to start work at 1pm today, at the store he was training at. He told me he was going to give them today to get their shit together - and that the rest of the week had better be at the other store, or that was it.

Needless to say, he thanked them for the opportunity to return to work for the company, but that he need more quality of life.

Now I'm hoping that the little over 30 hours he worked this week effected his eligibility for unemployment. This is what I was worried about all along .... if the job didn't pan out, that we'd be shooting ourselves in the foot, being disqualified from receiving further unemployment benefits. If I have my calculations right, we should be okay, but I am not very familiar with the benefits system and workings.

On another note - we have more sickness in the house. This time Braeden is ill. Started complaining of a headache Saturday afternoon. I gave him some children's motrin and he rested. Said he felt better. At 3am Sunday morning, he ran into our room, crying, saying his head hurt and that he needed to throw up. He threw up all over the bathroom floor/rugs. Took his temp - he was burning up - so Mike took him into the immediate care. They do the throat swab, temp check, etc, then ask if he would like a popsicle. He agrees and while he's eating it, throws up on the floor.

They send him home with the diagnosis of an upper respiratory infection and instructions for plenty of liquids, motrin/tylenol and rest. He finally gets back to sleep after 5am, and when he woke in the morning, he told me he was thirsty. I take him in for a drink, and immediately he threw it back up.

We got him to have some crackers and water later in the morning, which stayed down, but the fever persisted. He was laying on the floor, trembling, telling us how cold he was - and his fever was pushing 105 in the ear. We called the immediate care back, and they told us to alternate the tylenol and motrin, every 3 hours and a warm bath to get the fever down.

This seemed to help as long as we were on time with the next round of medicine. He ate a bit at dinner, watched some tv, got ready for bed, and awhile later complained that 'it hurt' and that he needed to throw up. Which he did all over his bedroom floor, the hallway and all over the other bathroom floor.

So far today we've been keeping up with the motrin and tylenol, and it's keeping the fever down. He has managed to eat and keep it down. Hopefully as the day progresses, he improves. We're getting closer to the end of the 24 hour period to keep alternating the meds. Hopefully his fever won't be anywhere near what it was, and that he's on the mend.

Someone has been sick in this house, with one thing or another, for well over a month now. I just want everyone healthy & well again!! PLEASE!!!!

Tuesday, March 06, 2007

Sick Again

I'm not sure if I'm stressing myself out too much and effecting my immune system or what, but I'm sick again.

This time I've got an ear infection.

I finished my 10-day script of amoxicilian on Friday the 2nd. By Saturday my throat felt funny again. The sore throat stuck around, and on my drive home from work yesterday, my ear started hurting out of the blue.

By the time I got home, it worsened. And by the time I was seen in the immediate care facility, I thought my ear was going to explode from all the pressure.

So now I've got a 10-day script of augmentin as well as a decongestant (which I decided to hold off on taking after reading all the warnings (ie: do not drive or operate machinery until you know how you react to this medication, etc etc)) and things are actually breaking up on their own. I noticed bits coming up when I cough now (gross!) and I'm able to blow my nose and expell more. Oh yeah, totally gross because it's this fantastic yellow color with a very faint hint of green. Wooohoooo!!!! (gag)

So I'm home from work today....I think I may head downstairs for some soup and then back into bed I go. I just crawled out of bed where I was watching Poseidon (good movie, btw).

Hopefully I can kick this illness and feel well again soon!

Friday, March 02, 2007


I am going to be unvoluntarily single.

While this may seem like good news, to me, it isn't.

It looks as if Mike got a job. With Sbarro. He put in 5 years of his life with them when we were first dating/got married and he worked long hours, and was always away from me and the kids.

He has been frustrated in not getting any job offers in the last month. His explanation is that at least he'll "be working and bringing home a paycheck". Yes, while this is all fine and dandy, he'll also be gone and at work 55 hours a week (and I just know that'll end up being more, just like it did years ago) and I can guarantee he'll be working Fridays, Saturdays and Sundays, just like he used to.

I work Monday thru Friday. My time off is evenings and weekends. Again, there will be no family time.

I guess we mean NOTHING. I guess a month (2 checks from unemployment) is just too long to have looked for a job. I guess it's more important to take the first thing that jumps out at you, even though it means being away from your family that much.

Well, let me put it into perspective -- is that job worth losing your family?

Think about it.