Tuesday, March 09, 2010

It's a Jungle Out There

Our state has recently banned texting while driving. You can be fined and presented with a moving violation if you are busted.

Everyday there's yet another offense added to the list of driving distractions.

Have any of these people ever ridden in a car with children?? I can text, chew gum, and sing along to tunes on the radio all while there's a blizzard AND road construction going on (hey, it's Chicago!), and still have better control of the car than I sometimes do with just the kids in the backseat.

"Mom, so and so is wiping boogers on the window!!!"

"KEEP YOUR LEG ON YOUR SIDE!!!!!!!"

"Stop looking at me!"

"MOMMMMMMM......so and so just rolled down the window and is climbing out"

Do you see how distracting THAT can be?

I admit, I'm guilty of doing other things while driving. I have abided by the new law and do not text while driving anymore, however, I do still chat on the phone. I have never been one to put on makeup, read, curl my eyelashes, or pick my nose while behind the wheel. I have sipped a beverage and sang along to the radio.

I have never felt that things were so unruly between my legs that, OMG! It must be taken care of. RIGHT. THIS. SECOND.

Seriously. Were things that bad for this woman? Was the jungle between her legs preventing her from accurately manuevering her feet to work the pedals?

Who decides that shaving your bikini area is best done while driving a vehicle? (Not to mention, Gross. What do you do with those jungle vines you are chopping down? Ew.)

Clearly that woman was smacked with the stupid stick a few times too many.

2 comments:

Southern Sage said...

bwhahahahahahhahahaa
She mighta hada hot date! gotta be smooth and ready I reckon!

Barb said...

Only in Florida! It's a wild and crazy place here. And did I read correctly that her ex husband was with her while she was shaving herself to meet a date?